P.M.bloody.R is over. Pressure free and qualms free. I will succumb to joy. No anxiety no sick twisted feeling in the guts or burst of tantrums over petty issues. Its a relief. This burden , this heavy mental feeling inside my thoughts is gone , or maybe it got slightly lighter. Although for everything to be sprinkled with euphoria the cherry on top would have to be an ominous and callous accident upon my brother who is actually the devil in the form of human being. Same crap different day : fighting/struggling with this urge to choke brother to death. As a result of tolerating crap from a 12 year old i realised i have more self-control which is a good thing. I have the decency to not murder a boy. Yay me. And with more time ahead of me , i will immerse myself in books and late night stays and hang out with my buds. I dont really mind having eyebags now , raccoon eyes sums up to people thinking that i do drugs.
ps. Dont scratch your skin until it bleeds.. it will leave a mark.
xxx
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